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| Wednesday, February 13, 2008 |
| Four and a Half Years of Waiting |
In August of 2003, on our way to gym, this happened:
E and Z were okay. H was pinned in the front passenger seat (yeah, I know, terrible mom- never again since). She had to be removed with the Jaws of Life. She is our miracle child. She shouldn't have survived the crash, yet came out with no broken bones. She had a faceful of glass that still surfaces to this day, but other than that...nothing. We have told her many times that God preserved her life for a reason and He must have a very special purpose for her.
I didn't fair so well. Because I was pressing on the brake so hard to stop the vehicle, I experienced a compound dislocation of my ankle. Basically, my right foot popped totally out sideway, tearing all my skin and exposing my leg bones at the bottom. My foot all but totally separated from my leg. I was like Humpty Dumpty, they put me back together again, but I've never quite been the same.
I kept telling the doctor that something with my nerves wasn't right and that the outside of my ankle really hurt. He said it was all normal and to give it time. A year later, he ran a nerve test and found a pretty good amount of nerve damage. Scar tissue had grown up where they had reattached the foot and was strangling the nerves. He said there was nothing wrong with the outside. I needed surgery to release the nerves and repair the foot.
One problem: When the wreck occurred we had no medical insurance and the car insurance had already been settled. Any surgery would be completely out of pocket. We didn't have the money. In 2005, we moved...expensive. Then we started the adoption...super expensive. Then we petitioned our new insurance to remove the rider on the ankle... no go! We decide to move overseas and serve there...extremely expensive.
The older I got, the more trouble I had with it. There were some days, especially after gymnastic meets, that I could barely walk the next day. By January 2008, I had resigned myself that I would never get my ankle repaired. The nerve damage I had gotten used to. I had accepted the fact that I would never wear cute shoes or walk barefoot on the grass again. I gave up my dream of a surgery to God.
Sometimes when we give up our dreams, God gives them back to us. At the end of January, D told me to go see a doctor. When I did, he told me that not only did I have the nerve damage, but there was a reason the outside hurt so much. I had several bone chips in there and a disconnected ligament.
Therefore, tomorrow, Valentine's Day, I'm getting the best Valentine present ever...a fixed foot. The doctor will be cutting into both sides of the ankle and repairing the damage. He will clean out the scar tissue on the inside and release the nerves and will clean up the bone chips and reconnect the ligament on the outside. I will be down for a week, then I will get a cast. I will be on crutches and with a cast for 4-6 weeks and then in a walking boot for a 2-4 more weeks.
Truthfully, I am a little nervous. I have wanted my foot fixed for so long, but now I am scared. I remember how hard it is to be a mom with no arms (crutches) and only one leg. I remember how hard showers are and cooking, even grocery shopping, etc. I'm trying to learn to drive with my left foot. I am not just dreading the recovery period, but I'm also a little nervous about the final result. It has been damaged for so long, I truly wonder how good it can be. The doc said there is no guarantee on the nerve damage side of things because it has been so long.
However, I am grateful to God for providing for us in a way that I can have a shot at it. It will hopefully make life easier in a country where walking over unpaved or poorly paved roads to go anywhere is the norm. It will help in climbing the million stairs up and down to our fifth floor apartment that they think we will have (no elevators). All in all, I hope it keeps me on my feet for many more years than I could have been otherwise.
I would truly love any of your prayers for the surgery tomorrow and for the recovery period afterward. I will try to update and let you know how it went as soon as I'm off the drugs enough to concentrate on a post. :-) In the meantime, I wish each of you a very happy Valentine's Day! |
posted by 6blessings @ 7:48 AM  |
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| 10 Comments: |
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Praying for you, your ankle, your surgery, your doctors and nurses, your recovery--and offering praise for this opportunity!
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God' Love extravagent. It gives me goose bumps and overwhelms my heart to think of it. Not to mention tears to my eyes as I am overwhelmed to feel his presance.
What a wonderful valentine! Our family will be praying for you. For complete healing, for guidence for the surgens hands. for peace as you recover, for help when you need it. And for God to give you opportunity in this time of weakness. (not being able to move around freely!)
Happy Love Day!
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I really hope all goes well for you tomorrow. I know how sucky surgery can be. Your kids are good though, they will take care of you.
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I knew you had been in an accident but... wow. Wow. I will definitely be thinking of you today and sending good wishes your way. You'll do great!
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Yea! I have often wondered if/when you were going have the surgery. I will pray that all goes well.
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I remember the day it happened. We will be thinking of you and all of your family.
Deana
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Wow! What a story! Who is paying for your surgery? Did your insurance agree to pay for it? And also, where are moving too? Russia?
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Oh, and I hope your surgery is going well! It will be great to hear that your foot is no longer causing you pain.
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Sending prayers and hugs your way! The picture of your van is frightening. Hopefully you will have a speedy recovery and a lot of little helpful hands around the house!
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I'm hoping the surgery was successful and that you are doing okay now. Please let us know when you get a chance. Praying that all goes well!
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Praying for you, your ankle, your surgery, your doctors and nurses, your recovery--and offering praise for this opportunity!